Dreams

At school, I teach with a very, very cool chick named Jenna.  She’s right across the hall from me; I’ve been her official support/mentor teacher since she started two Octobers ago, though she really doesn’t need much help from me–she’s fabulous.  I really like her, and we hit it off right off the bat.  I call us “The Writing Divas”–remember those wonderful writing scores I bragged about a couple of months ago?  Well, she played a hand in them as well.  She teaches a couple of classes of eighth-grade (as well as seventh grade).  She is a phenomenal teacher and just good people–very down-to-earth and just genuinely nice.

She has published a book!  I feel like her mom I’m so full of pride.  She has inspired me to stop being so scared to share my writing.  This blog doesn’t count.  I’m talking real writing.   

But this isn’t about me for once (I know, shocking!).   I think you should help support a fellow single-mom teacher who is reaching for her life-long dream.  Here is the link to Amazon.  And once you read it, tell your friends.   Here is her website as well.  She is about as adorable as they come, huh?

Wanted to Share

Okay, so I complained about turning forty, but I didn’t focus on the positive regarding how special one of my bestest besties made me feel that day.  Lisa is one of the most dear, truly TRUE friends I have. 

She called me a week or so before my birthday and asked what I was doing on my actual birthday.  Sidenote–our friend, MJ, is hosting a big birthday bash for Lisa and me because she (Lisa) turns forty this year, too… in a couple of weeks.  But that party isn’t until the 22nd.  I told her I had zero plans–truly wasn’t going to do anything…I mean, it’s not like Jordan can take me out.  That wasn’t acceptable to her :)  We made plans to eat dinner at Tia’s (love me some Mexican food).  I was happy because, let’s be honest, who wants to do NOTHING on his/her birthday?   Okay, so Jordan and I got there, and Lisa had a huge bouquet of Gerbera daisies (my absolute favorites, which of course she knows) sitting on top of the table.  You know I got all teary-eyed.  Then a little bit later, while I was bitching about how long the waiter was taking to come get our order, around the corner came two more of my friends, MJ and Vickie.  And, yeah, I felt bad for bitching about the waiter (I didn’t complain TO him…just to Lisa…and she kept making excuses that, looking back, are hilarious…like, “He must like the hostess…he’s up there flirting with her”…)!!  LOL  Obviously he was told to wait until our other two friends got there.   I was so surprised…I had no idea Lisa had anything up her sleeve.  We had a great dinner.  Sangria, margaritas, Mexican food…need I say more? 

Lisa is just that kind of friend.  Does everything in her power to make you feel special.  Her gift was amazing…the thought in it is amazing.  I have to share with you, my blog peeps.  She bought me a journal while she was in Ireland, which in and of itself is beautiful.  But, because she is just an amazingly thoughtful friend, she “filled” that journal.  First, with the most beautiful words about me and our friendship.  Then, she filled it with “40 Things to Love about Rhonda” (and one to grow on)…little slips of paper with things to love about me!  Now, come one, who out there wouldn’t love to know that about themselves???  )  Here are pictures:

journal from Ireland

 

Do not zoom in...I just wanted you to see how much Lisa loves me )

 

 

 

Some of the things that make me wonderful--at least according to Lisa.

Wouldn’t you feel mighty special if someone did this for you?  She is amazing.  I had to share this on here.  Hope you don’t mind, Lisa.  :)  I’ll beg for forgiveness (now, after the fact).

Another delicious goody I received for my birthday was from another bestie, Melissa.  I am sooo in love with this.  You guys know I love dragonflies…and I love pink.  Well, look at this:

Coach dragonfly keychain

It’s so beautiful.  And I’m always scared now that I’m going to drop my keys!!!  LOL  It is just so pretty and delicate, and I’ll be so sad if anything happens to it. 

I should also show the books my parents got me :)  I didn’t take pictures though.  Sorry, Mom. 

I know birthdays aren’t about people giving you things.  I just realized the way this post may be misinterpreted.  Oops.  Hopefully you get where I’m coming from.  

Inspiration

This blog, African Kelli, is one that you should bookmark on your computer and follow.  Kelli is such an amazing person.  I don’t even remember how I stumbled upon her blog a couple of years ago, but I’m so grateful I did.   Her words/thoughts/outlook on life will inspire you.  Period.

Oil and Water

Jordan and I are not getting along this week.  Sounds funny to state it like that, but that’s really the deal.  We’re like oil and water.  He’s irritating the hell out of me, and I’m SURE he feels the same about me.  It doesn’t sound very maternal to admit your child is pissing you off, but if you have children, you would be lying if you said you’ve never felt the same way.  I am just bold enough to post it out here in blogland for all the world to read.  I love my son more than my life.  He is my heart and soul…but my Lord has he developed quite an attitude lately.  He can’t answer a question without it dripping with attitude.  He had his Xbox 360 taken away all of Monday…earned it back Tuesday and lost it again yesterday.  Luckily he is such a book lover, so he wasn’t ever really bored, but I am pretty sure he was having “video game” withdrawals…I thought I saw some twitching and drooling last night!!!   hahahhaha  His Aunt Melissa has him tonight.  I think she realized how “on the edge” I am with him, and she swooped in and took him home with her today.  So I have a mental health day.  Maybe my blood pressure will go back down to normal now.  I am going to go do an hour on the treadmill later, so maybe that’ll help de-stress me, too. 

I’m off to Barnes and Noble.  I have a birthday gift card to redeem.

Me

Well, I tried to fight it.  I kicked and screamed and cursed and begged and pleaded—but my fortieth birthday got me anyway.  Don’t misread—I am blessed to be alive and to be able to usher in a fortieth birthday.  I have friends who, when I would lament about turning forty, would say, “It’s better than the alternative”—meaning death of course.  Yeah, you’re damn right turning forty is better than NOT turning forty.  I’ve never disputed that.  Forty, the number, just seems so old.  And I am NOT OLD.  Hell, most days I feel like an insecure teenager.  How can I be forty and still have the same stupid insecurities that I did when I was twelve, thirteen, fourteen, etc…?  How can I, at forty, still be the sensitive ten-year-old inside—the one who, if you even look at her funny, wants to cry?  How can I still be, at forty, as confused about the male species as I was when I was sixteen?  Where is the “wisdom that comes with age” that everyone touts?  I don’t feel that much wiser about many things.  I am mostly a positive person, but I have to be honest and say most days it’s a struggle not to feel jaded and pessimistic.  Why hasn’t that gone away now that I’m forty? 

 

Turning forty isn’t all bad, of course.  I have an eight-year-old boy who is my heart and soul with legs.  I have a career doing exactly what I wanted to do ever since I was a little girl, and I am finally thinking, after fourteen years, maybe I do it okay (most days…).  I have family who loves me in spite of all my many flaws.   And I have some of the dearest, most wonderful friends who do “get me”.   I’d love to be one of those “wise” forty-year-olds who’s comfortable in her skin and confident in herself.  Not happenin’ over here folks…not yet.  I have to fight my “recluse tendencies”, too. I find myself climbing into my head more and more.  I live there too much.  I could go days and days without talking to anyone. And if that doesn’t make sense to you, then you are one of the many people who just don’t get me. That makes me sad sometimes.   But I think that is a common dilemma—no one ever feels completely understood. 

 

“I am not the person who is singing/I am the silent one inside/I am not the one who laughs at people’s jokes/I just pacify their egos/I am not my house or my car or my songs/They are only just stops along my way/I am like winter/I’m a dark cold female/With a golden ring of wisdom in my cave…”  Paula Cole.

Eeyore

I’ve neglected my blog so much lately.  I’m surprised she’ll let me even log on here!  LOL 

My summer is coming to an end.  I have a huge milestone birthday coming up on 8/7 (yes, that’s a plug in hopes of getting nice presents from all of you!!  just kidding…sort of).  We teachers go back to school on 8/17.  Kids go back on 8/25.  Yep, my summer is as good as over.  I’ve been doing writing trainings for the last three weeks.  I have one more week to go.  I have been training English teachers on “Motivating Writers”.  It’s been an amazing experience.  I’m sorry, but English teachers just ROCK.  I’ve worked with almost 150 so far and everyone has been soooo kind and receptive.  That is not always the case at workshops.  Teachers can be brutal!  Not paying attention…texting…talking…reading…etc.  Anything except paying attention.  I have not had that experience this summer.  It’s been wonderful. 

I’ve been in a very “Eeyore” kinda mindset lately, though.  My principal got moved to another school, and if you follow me on Facebook you know I’ve been very down because of this.  Also, the birthday that’s looming in the background has something to do with it.  I don’t like feeling so blue.  It’s not my nature at all.  It’s too much work being down!  LOL  So I’m working on a better attitude.  I mean, it’s not like my principal is coming back, right?  I need to build a bridge and get over it (that’s a famous line I use on my students, FYI).  And the birthday’s coming, God willing, whether I want to admit my age or not.  But I am going to be lying about it…really.  I am 32.  When people ask, that’s my reply henceforth.

Jordan’s doing so well.  He’s still playing basketball, but golf has come to an end for the summer.  I want him to continue to play once school starts, though.

Okay, so I’m updated…a little.  I have much more I could write but I’m out of time for now.

Golf

Jordan started golf on Monday.  Below is a link to access the pictures.  Don’t judge his form too harshly…remember that these are pictures from day one and day two.  He’d never picked up a golf club until three days ago.  He is enjoying it, though on day one he got a bit overheated out there.  It’s damn hot outside in Florida.  But after he got himself hydrated, he was fine.  We talked that night about preemptive measures—to drink water BEFORE he gets out on the course.  So, yesterday was a better day in that regard—no “almost” heat stroke. 

Maybe I’m just the biased mother, but damn my boy is adorable!   Click here and it’ll bring you to the album on my Facebook page.  You don’t have to have to be a member to access it.

Day Three

I am on day three of my summer vacay.  I don’t actually get the whole summer off.  I don’t personally know any teachers who actually get the whole summer off.  Most of us have to work another job and/or take workshops all summer.  But I am free until July 13th (with two workshops between now and the 13th).  Because I cannot relax at my own home until my houseguests are gone (which is looking like that’ll NEVER happen), I have been dropping Jordan off at basketball camp at the “Y”, and then either going to Panera Bread (free wi-fi) or to Barnes and Noble.  Today I am at Panera.  I could totally fall asleep in this big comfy chair.  Lord knows I can’t relax in my own home!!!  >:o(  I should utilize my Bally’s membership…yeah, right.  My plan to lose 40 lbs before my 40th birthday fizzled out.    Boooooo! 

I posted a bunch of new photos of Jordan on my Facebook page.  If you have a Facebook page and are on my ‘friend’ list, check them out.  I’m too lazy to post too many here, but here are a few:

Channeling Scott Weiland

 

Glam rocker!

Those were taken at Miss Lisa’s a few months ago during a sleep-over she had.  The theme was “rock and roll” in case you couldn’t tell!  lol

Here are a few pics of Jordan from basketball camp:

Nothin' but net, baby!

 

Future ballah!

And lastly, here is the Clone Troopers helmet (from Star Wars) that Jordan wanted so badly.  I think it’s a bit creepy (it has a voice changer and everything!), but if he’s happy, I’m happy.  He wanted to wear it to lunch the other day.  We compromised—he was allowed to wear it in the car, but not into Subway.

Clone Trooper helmet w/ voice changer

That’s The Way The Ball Bounces

My little guy started basketball today.  He has a clinic today and next Saturday with some dude who’s worked in the NBA (as a trainer).  Then this upcoming week he has basketball camp at the “Y”.  On June 22nd, the actual league starts. 

When I dropped him off this morning, it took a lot of will power not to cry—ME, not him.  He’s just growing up too fast, and my poor old heart can barely take it.  We shopped yesterday for new tennis shoes (wow, are Nike Shox pricey!) and basketball shorts.  He looked so cute this morning.  I didn’t take a picture, but I will when I pick him up.  I was too emotional this morning to be ‘with it’ enough to do it.  I walked him in to the gymnasium and wanted so badly to stay, but I didn’t.  I also wanted so badly to kiss that sweet little face, but I refrained.  I sensed that that just wasn’t the cool thing to do in front of all those boys and men, and Jordan probably would’ve shunned me which would’ve stung badly.  So I leaned in and whispered to him, “I really want to kiss you right now, but I’m not going to.”  Jordan smiled really big and whispered back, “I love you,” and off he went, bouncing his basketball across the court, leaving me standing there, fighting back tears.  Wow, am I a complete sap or what?

I am going back early to sneak a peek.  There are windows that you can look through into the gym.  I want to watch him without him knowing.

I am officially on summer vacay.  I actually packed up my classroom on time this year…first time in fourteen years.  I am always one of those teachers who has to go back on my own time the week after school is out and finish packing up.  Not this year.  I’m not sure how I managed this time.  But it felt great.  I am working this summer but not until July 13th.  I am doing eight two-day writing workshops (giving the training…not receiving) for our county to fellow teachers who sign up.  The training is geared towards motivating writers.  I’m nervous as hell, but I’m also thrilled, too.  Plus, the money is great. But like I said, that doesn’t start until July 13th.  In the interim, I am planning to do some writing, and I have a STACK of books I cannot wait to read.

Power of Facebook

The power of Facebook.  I logged on this morning and was looking at all my friends’ update statuses, and I noticed a handful of my former students’  statuses kept referring to Liliana (a former student…)…that they are praying for her, that they hope she pulls through.  So I figured out quickly that something had happened to Liliana.  I emailed a few of those former students and got some sketchy, unverified (at first) info that Liliana had been in a car accident.  Well, that was partially true.    Here’s what actually happened…click here.

At the time of printing, Liliana and her mom were unidentified.  Liliana was a student of mine when she was in seventh grade.  She is supposed to graduate from Hillsborough High School this Thursday.  Incredible student…extremely intelligent and extremely driven.  In fact, she was one of two kids in the country to receive the Academic Excellence and Leadership Award from the Society of Hispanic Professional Engineers [which is why I think she was in Miami...receiving that award].  If you go to my school district’s website (click here) you can see her.  Look at the box that says “Good News and Information”…scroll down almost to the bottom…you’ll see her and the blurb about the Excellence Award. 

She is in coma.  Please pray for her.  Her mom died on the scene.  So, even if, God willing, Liliana comes out of the coma, she’s going to get blind-sided yet again—with the knowledge of her mother being dead.  Ain’t that some shit?